


numb in this kingdom

by plinys



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Original Trilogy, Star Wars Prequel Trilogy
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-16
Updated: 2016-01-16
Packaged: 2018-05-14 09:32:13
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,923
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5738533
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/plinys/pseuds/plinys
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>She stares into the mirror and practices the words, until they seem true. “I am Leia Naberrie, Queen of Naboo."</p>
            </blockquote>





	numb in this kingdom

**Author's Note:**

> Because Beej kept sharing "AU if Padme lived" HCs with me, and I had to write /something/.

She stares into the mirror and practices the words, until they seem true.

“I am Leia Naberrie, Queen of Naboo. My mother is Sola Naberrie. My father, Darred Naberrie, is an architect. I have two sisters, Ryoo and Pooja, and a younger brother named Luke. I respect everything the emperor has done for the galaxy and am happy to- Oh Kriff.”

This meeting is to be one of the most important of her life, the fate of the galaxy rests on her shoulders, and yet staring at her painted reflection in the mirror she cannot help herself from wishing that she could send one of her handmaidens in instead. They would go if she asked, happily down the ceremonial robes and make up while playing the part of _Leia Naberrie_.

Just as she has played the part for years.

Each lie becoming easier with the passing of time.

“I am Leia Naberrie, Queen of Naboo,” she starts again.

This one is true. She is a Naberrie of Naboo.

Her home is the lake country. Looking out onto the water from the balcony as her _siblings_ run through the sandy beaches, Luke always begs her to join his voice the loudest. He says it inside of her head, imploring her to toe off her heels and join them. Each time she shakes her head playfully. She’s never liked the sand.

Other times her home is the city, in the yellow room the faces out onto the busy street below. The house her grandfather built, the house her _mother_ grew up in. She runs her fingers along the edges of the window, sometimes catching glimpses of people she’s never met, lives she’s never lived. There are memories built into the stone of her home.

Though most recently her home is the palace, for she is the Queen of Naboo. Not the youngest their ever was, but certainly not the oldest. She is a Queen. Her people look up to her, they expect her to guide them through these troubling times.

“My mother is Sola Naberrie.”

She wonders how long her aunt practiced these very same words before she could speak them for herself. How many times she had to insist that the twins were her children, that during the year she spent in the lake country following her sister’s death she gave birth to two children. Perhaps it got easier over time.

Sola would tell her the stories, the sorties of the once queen of Naboo, her beautiful sister who was lost to the world too soon. Padmé’s beauty is known by all, as is her love of Naboo and for the survival of the _republic_. It is the stories of her, that Leia tells all, inspired her to get into politics.

Padmé’s old handmaidens come by from time to time, each with their own tales of royal misadventures. Sab **é**   tells the best stories. The stories that no other could tell. She never stays too long, returning once again to the outer rim, a planet with a name Leia can never remember. A new home where she can live safely from prying eyes.

Some say that they could have sworn Sabé died years before, a starship accident, the body never found. But they forget the words whenever they are in Leia’s presence, smiling as they repeat back to her the insistence that the woman before them can only be _Sabé_.

When she smiles, there are dimples on her cheeks, one that Leia matches when she returns the smile. But this is not uncommon – Sabé was chosen as a decoy for a reason – they are meant to look similar.

“My father, Darred Naberrie, is an architect.”

This lie is harder.

Uncle Darred for all his kindness could never be her father. His plays the part stiffly, away at work often enough that she can forget the way his eyes linger on her and Luke with a hint of worry. She knows not what to say to him in this moments, looking at the man who raised her and her brother as though they were a burden.

Her true father is a mystery.

Once she had thought the man that came with _Sabé_ could be her father. There was kindness in his eyes, and a familiar energy running through his veins.

She remembers all too clearly the one time Luke had been bold enough to ask, his voice hushed and undertone so that no one could hear them. She remembers the way he had frozen in his seat, face pinched as if in pain, before pulling Luke towards him in a nervous motion.

After that he simply remained _Uncle Ben_ it was better this way.

“I have two sisters, Ryoo and Pooja, and a younger brother named Luke.”

Pooja is why she is here now.

Why the Queen of Naboo has left the safety of her home world venturing to a planet that seems always in motion, to the home of the Imperial Senate. But it was necessary, there are plans being set into motion, and Leia refuses to wait on Naboo while other people take action.

The Senator had been hesitant, concerned for the safety of the woman she had called her younger sister, but Leia was insistent.

Leia Naberrie was not the type of person to sit idly by.

A fact which worried her brother more than he would ever admit to her face – as though she cannot feel the very emotions stirring within his mind, each time he glances at her face with features so like his own.

All too clearly she recalls the last time they spoke to each other. How he had sprawled out on her bed in the palace as though it were his own, having a conversation between just the two of them with no words needing to be spoken. He was worried about her, concerned and desperate to protect her, with each truth that spilled from her lips.

 _“There is a war going on out there_ ,” she had insisted bitter and cruel. Watching the way his face had twisted up in pain. He knew all too well what was going on around the galaxy, feeling the pain and darkness just as easily as she did.

“ _What would you do_ ,” he had asked of her, _“Fight them all_.”

The words “i _f I had to_ ,” had fallen from her lips all too easily. Startling them all with the need for the words to be said out loud their conversations no longer safely hidden instead their heads.

In the end he had understood, as best as her compassionate brother could. Luke was not a fighter, but he would if worse came to worse. He would if his family were in danger.

When she had first been elected Queen, he had dressed as one of her handmaidens, in order to sit in on her meetings – to keep a watchful eye on her. The act fooled no one, though each attempt she made to insist that he step out of the gowns for everyone knew who he was, only gained her a quizzical look and the insistence that they were _twins_ , clearly nobody should be able to tell them apart.

She misses him the most, longs for the presence of her twin beside her.

Luke would give her the strength to get through this meeting.

As if sensing her from lightyears away, she feels a burst of compassion inside of her, a hint of comfort.

The next words come easier.

“I respect everything the emperor has done for the galaxy and am happy to finally be making his acquaintance.”

\---

The Emperor is not what she imagined him to be.

She remembers all too clearly the stories Uncle Ben would tell them, long after Sola and the rest of her family had retired for the night. Of the Sith Lord that had disguised himself as a politician, as the man who sought to ruin the galaxy for his own personal enjoyment. She remembers the stories of the war, of the people lost, how both sides bled for nothing, all at the hands of a puppet master.

The man before her does not look strong enough to do that.

His features are weathered such that a hood covers his face, only a smile – the practiced smile of a career politician – greets her.

She tries to mirror it in her own features, her painted cheeks contorting ever so slightly.

“I remember once before another Queen stood before me in this very same room, entreating me to bring aid to our home planet,” the Emperor says. “She looked a bit like you, younger I suppose.”

“We all look the same,” Leia insists, “It’s the makeup, meant to create a sense of uniformity.”

The emperor’s reaction is impossible to gaze, but she can feel hints of it, a lingering presence in the air.

Amusement.

He finds her amusing.

“You are speaking of my aunt, perhaps? The late Queen Amidala.”

“Yes,” this time his voice is low and sinister, and she can feel it in her bones. Like a pinprick of pain. She remembers her training, breathing in and out, she constructs a brick wall in her mind. An impenetrable fortress.

If all else fails there is the weapon strapped to her thigh, hidden beneath the extravagant folds of her dress, an elegant weapon for a more civilized age.

“You remind me of her.”

“I am glad to hear this. It is her memory that inspired me to take an active role in our planet’s politics,” Leia says. “It is what she would’ve wanted.”

There’s a brief flash of something in her mind, an approving gaze, warm hands encircling hers, but then the image is gone. Her focus is back on the emperor.

Neither of them say anything for a long moment. She wonders if he is attempting to read her, as she is reading him. If so, what does he discover there?

She does not dare to ask.

In the end it matters not, for his next words as good as seal her fate. “I suppose I have kept you long enough, your sister must be longing for your company.”

Her mind seems to fail her. So caught up in the task of keeping its secrets hidden that she cannot help her mouth. Cannot help the questioning tone, as the word, “Sister,” falls from her lips.

She can only watch with horror a minute later as his lips quirk up ever so slightly into a smile that could only be classified as _sinister_.

\---

She gets on the first transport back to Naboo, but she knows it’s not enough.

In the back of her mind, she can feel Luke’s panic. As he reaches out to her over the distance between them willing her to be safe, already making plans to cross the galaxy if he has to in order to ensure her safety.

Though all thoughts of her brother fade away as she is brought forward, to the emperor’s right hand. It is not fear coursing through her veins, but righteous fury.

Leia senses something within this husk of a man as he looks down on her, a hint of familiarity as he takes in the ceremonial robes, the color dotting her cheeks and lips. For a second she senses uncertainty, and hesitation.

She is not sure what to do with this information, but it matters not, for as she begins to speak, he regains his composure.

“You are a part of the Rebel Alliance and a traitor!”

 


End file.
